Louicat's world

Apparently I insulted the blogging world today as I said I hadn't blogged anything 'proper' for a while, this is according to the bestest blogger of all time of course steevy, who I would like to add, only joined bloggers circle very recently so I don't really think he's been around long enough to be making such comments..anyways..what I actually meant was that I hadn't written much that tied in with the theme of this blog, although come to think of it, it is defined as 'Louicat's random thoughts' so there you go, I am fulfilling the criteria so perhaps you are right after all my dear but never-the-less I am indeed rambling, I do this a lot..SO..

I'm currently working on my business studies coursework, its not going to badly. I've got quite a packed easter hols this year, with working, revising and steevy-ing, just finished makin my egg for steevy today, though it is only half an egg now, but its all good! lol.

So lets be religious for a moment, I'm not very religious of late. Though I have to say I hate the word religious, cause we're not called to be that at all, but faithful. I don't like to be considered religious, though I'm happy to be thought that than nothing. Woo 3 sentences of jumbled up mush, I like it! lol. Yes so back to the point, when I think about where my life is now, I'm happy, my life is full of things to occupy me, but that won't always be the case. Its in the quiet moments it begins to dawn, how far I've travelled from God, and although I know I'm not as far as I have been in the past, I know I'm no-where near. I'm scared of trying though. I tried so hard to reach out to God, to feel him in my life, but it caused me too much pain, I don't wanna go through that again, but I'm not happy with where I am now, so what do I do? I'm waiting, but I don't know what for. Roots is just around the corner, it makes sense to make that my focal point, to get my relationship with God back on track, but I tried that once before, it just doesn't work like that. However its all in God's time, so maybe this time is the time? I'm trying to find the middle road, to not expect too much, but still remain expectant, its a hard medium to grasp. I just hope God shows me the way; I really want to him to be part of my life. Circumstance lifts me above it all for the time being, but for how long can I keep my head above the water? I just wait now.